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Paula Susan is Helping People from every part of South Jersey.

 

As the specialist in South Jersey counseling people for trauma issues (big and small) and relationship challenges (any kind), I see more and more people are desiring something stable and good in their personal lives. They are not willing to settle any more. Divorces are happening in long marriages like 36 or 40 something years. Dissatisfied people young and old should come to me to heal long carried resentments and pain.

 

I, Paula Susan, am known as the specialist for trauma issues (sometimes from long ago) and all the marital and relationship issues from anger, infidelity, lack of communication, sexual problems and the list goes on. You might be surprised that I see people from the shore area, Cherry Hill, Moorestown, Voorhees, Mt. Laurel, and everywhere in between. Sometimes, from Philadelphia, too. Why travel to a therapist when there is one close by? See my website paulasusan.com No one has to live unhappy in South Jersey. Make this an important investment for the rest of your life. Travel if you have to. You will see how deep healing in a relatively short time can transform your life.

 Know what happiness and contentment you can have, if you commit to making the quality of your life count.

 I’m Paula Susan right here in South Jersey. I have been doing this work since 1982. Check me out.

Posted in Anger, Choosing a partner, Chronic Illness, Couples Counseling, Creating Intimacy in Relationships, Falling in love, Family Counseling, Keeping Relationships Healthy and Fun, Marriage Counseling, NJ Counseling Services, PTSD Therapists, Relationship with Mothers and Fathers, Relationships on Holidays, Sex, Sexual attraction, South Jersey Counseling, South Jersey Therapists

South Jersey Relationship/Couples and Trauma Specialist talks about facing another unhappy year with your partner.

Hi, and Happy New Year!  I have been specializing in the field of marriage and trauma therapy since 1982. And, every year it is the same, in my practice. The phones are ringing off the hook after the holidays, with people so sad about facing another year in an unhappy, unfulfilling relationship.

Reading my web site, www.paulasusan.com, you will see there is a lot of wisdom in deciding to do this work before you leave your marriage, or have an affair, or build another year of anger.

With an understanding of what you value that still exists between you and what the challenges are, you learn a way to hear and “get” the differences in each of you, and why there is so much distance and friction.

Call me at 856-638-1868 and we can talk about your specific struggle. This investment in short-term therapy can give you lifelong benefits!

Posted in Anger, Choosing a partner, Chronic Illness, Couples Counseling, Creating Intimacy in Relationships, Falling in love, Family Counseling, Keeping Relationships Healthy and Fun, Marriage Counseling, NJ Counseling Services, PTSD Therapists, Relationship with Mothers and Fathers, Relationships on Holidays, Sex, Sexual attraction, South Jersey Counseling, South Jersey Therapists

South Jersey’s Specialist in Relationships/Marriage and Trauma Speaks About the Painful Revelations Around Holidays and the Coming new Year.

Web site blog

 

South Jersey’s Specialist in Relationships/Marriage and Trauma speaks about the painful revelations around holidays and the coming New Year.

Since 1982, I have been listening to couples who have been in a relationship or marriage a long time. Many of them feel lonely. Many are angry because their relationship is nothing like they expected it to be. The sexual connection is gone. The romance is non-existent, and they fight a lot. The expression is they are not “on the same page”.

Some people admit they are ready to have affairs. Their partners are no longer interested in them, and they are longing to be touched, to be listened to, to be loved.

If you are feeling this way, too, read my web site www.paulasusan.com, take the relationship quiz, and call me at 856-638-1868.

I not only revive relationships and marriages, I heal the pain that has been carried inside for years. I will teach you how to open your hearts again to this person you once loved, and who loved you.

Face Christmas and the New Year with hope, and a path to deeply loving again.

 

Posted in Anger, Choosing a partner, Chronic Illness, Couples Counseling, Creating Intimacy in Relationships, Falling in love, Family Counseling, Keeping Relationships Healthy and Fun, Marriage Counseling, NJ Counseling Services, PTSD Therapists, Relationship with Mothers and Fathers, Relationships on Holidays, Sex, Sexual attraction, South Jersey Counseling, South Jersey Therapists

South Jersey’s Specialist for Complex Relationships/Marriages & Trauma Issues Discusses How Growing Up in Dysfunction Can be the Reason for Disharmony and Distrust. EMDR to the Rescue.

I promised myself back in 1982, when I chose to specialize in relationships and trauma, that I would not be a Freudian. Everything cannot possibly originate with Mom. Well, certainly not everything. Dad and early circumstances set the tone for how people think and feel about themselves and their ability to relate to others.

That is why I make a point of seeing each member of the couple alone for one session to get background information and to create a comfortable space for honesty and growth.

Sure enough, the person who is angry a lot, carries the anger from childhood, deep in the unconscious, because of neglect or abuse. It shows up in relationships. The lack of trust and safety from those early days interferes with the trust that is needed for intimacy in a marriage.

ENDR will heal those deep wounds as well as wounds from the present such as affairs in the relationship. People come away from our work feeling transformed and whole. Communication becomes something that pulls them close and loving with each other.

Call and speak with me 856-638-1868

 

Posted in Anger, Choosing a partner, Chronic Illness, Couples Counseling, Creating Intimacy in Relationships, Falling in love, Family Counseling, Keeping Relationships Healthy and Fun, Marriage Counseling, NJ Counseling Services, PTSD Therapists, Relationship with Mothers and Fathers, Relationships on Holidays, Sex, Sexual attraction, South Jersey Counseling, South Jersey Therapists

South Jersey’s Specialist in Relationships/Marriage & Trauma

South Jersey’s Specialist in Relationships/Marriage & Trauma

Why Seeing Couples Together and Separately is the Best Way

 

Since 1982, I’ve specialized in working with complex couples relationships – actually any kind of relationship. What I’ve learned through the years of counseling is that seeing couples only together doesn’t allow for the whole story to come out. (Most of my colleagues only see couples together.)

 

Many people are not comfortable expressing their biggest complaints in front of their partners. They fear their partner will be angry and hurt them in some way. Sometimes one partner is having an affair and if the therapist doesn’t know, then they are wasting their money. That person needs to resolve where he/she wants to be before real marriage counseling can begin.

 

So, when I invite a couple in for the first meeting, I have them fill in the Inventory on my website and we discuss that in the first meeting. I lay out how I work so they know what to expect. The next two sessions are designed for me to see each person alone – to establish a connection and to get background information. Then I bring them together and teach a fabulous communication skill that creates safety and deep understanding between them. It is a relationship builder.

 

EMDR is what I use to heal anger, shame, resentments, abuse, affairs… and to help build healthy self-respect.

Relationships can be transformed into something worth living!

 

Call me at 856-638-1868 and we can talk.

Posted in Anger, Choosing a partner, Chronic Illness, Couples Counseling, Creating Intimacy in Relationships, Falling in love, Family Counseling, Keeping Relationships Healthy and Fun, Marriage Counseling, NJ Counseling Services, PTSD Therapists, Relationship with Mothers and Fathers, Relationships on Holidays, Sex, Sexual attraction, South Jersey Counseling, South Jersey Therapists

Relationship/Marriage and Trauma Specialist of South Jersey Defines Love

Relationship/Marriage and Trauma Specialist of South Jersey Defines Love

 

I’m Paula Susan and am faced with couples who come in every day feeling they have lost their love for each other. There are many ways people do that, when once their relationship was wonderful. I think we take for granted that it will always be there, and that your partner will always be there as well.

 

Relationships are complex. Bringing who we are and who we have been in our lives into a relationship with someone else who does the same, there will be conflicts and disappointments.

 

Learn how you can let go of resentments with the work that I do. Learn how to talk to each other differently to re-establish the lost intimacy! Don’t walk away until you really understand what love is and how to heal, grow, and sustain it.

 

Call 856-638-1868 -and we can talk after you read WHAT KILLS LOVE.  Go to readhttp://www.familyaffaires.com/what-kills-love/

then give me a call.

Posted in Anger, Choosing a partner, Couples Counseling, Creating Intimacy in Relationships, Falling in love, Family Counseling, Keeping Relationships Healthy and Fun, Marriage Counseling, NJ Counseling Services, PTSD Therapists, Relationship with Mothers and Fathers, Sex, Sexual attraction, South Jersey Counseling, South Jersey Therapists

South Jersey Relationships/Marriage, and Trauma Specialist – Integrates EMDR for effective, efficient deep healing.

 

 

South Jersey Relationships/Marriage, and Trauma Specialist – Integrates EMDR for effective, efficient deep healing. 

See more, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_QJbCtr8bvA

 

I am an early pioneer in EMDR Therapy. I studied with Francine Shapiro, the scientist who created the process, in 1991. I have since made it my own, also using skills I have developed from other masters in my field.

 

Knowing the therapeutic community here in South Jersey, I differentiate myself from most therapists by integrating EMDR or HAT (Heart Assisted Therapy) into all my work. I teach a communication process that is the finest I’ve seen in my entire career. People begin to truly hear each other, with understanding and compassion, which leads to the intimacy that was lost over time.

 

I make it part of my protocol to see each person individually to make a connection, get background information, and to hear anything they might be uncomfortable sharing in front of their partner. As the therapist, I need and want all the information I can have, to do a thorough job of helping people let go of their anger and upset with each other, and to build an intimate relationship of trust again – or to separate respectfully.

 

If there is a hidden affair, I want to help that person see the reality of their conflict, and to help them define what they want for themselves.

 

 

 

Relationships and marriages are complex. Everyone brings aspects of their past into the present. Many are not aware just how much the past affects us. EMDR gives access to “attachment” damages, and restores wholeness.

 

I’m proud to be in my 35th year of coming through for people who needed to learn new ways of achieving happiness and peace.

 

 

Now that you are on my website, browse categories that interest you. Check out the testimonials. Then call me at 856-638-1868.

Posted in Anger, Choosing a partner, Chronic Illness, Couples Counseling, Creating Intimacy in Relationships, Falling in love, Family Counseling, Keeping Relationships Healthy and Fun, Marriage Counseling, NJ Counseling Services, PTSD Therapists, Relationship with Mothers and Fathers, Relationships on Holidays, Sex, Sexual attraction, South Jersey Counseling, South Jersey Therapists

South Jersey Marriage/Relationship and Trauma Specialist Discusses Sex

South Jersey Marriage/Relationship and Trauma Specialist Discusses Sex

 

Hi: I’m Paula Susan, a specialist in Marriage/Relationship and Trauma Counseling since 1982. That’s a long time to be witness to the suffering of human beings. It’s also a long time to welcome the privilege of deeply healing the issues that show up in those areas.

 

If you take a look at my website, you will have the opportunity to see and hear me – to read the words that describe who I am and what I have to offer.

 

This is just a short blog to tell you that sex IS a vital part of relationships! When there is none, when there is pressured sex, when there is a major difference in desire, when rejection and despair take the place of what was once a vibrant sexual connection, it can be a relationship killer.

 

When relationships/marriages do not live up to your expectation, that is usually one of the first things to go. It is then replaced by loneliness, anger, despair.

 

So, it is important for people to understand there is no shame in seeking help for the improvement of a disappointing marriage or relationship. The shame is neglecting it and allowing the distance to grow. If you loved once, then you could learn ways to heal the distance and resentment between you. You can learn a way to communicate which allows for deep connection and repair.

 

And, while you are at it, may I offer two short articles on familyaffaires.com for your read. I think it speaks to speaking about sex when no one talks about it.

 

http://www.familyaffaires.com/sex-can-can-talk-part-1/ http://www.familyaffaires.com/sex-can-can-talk-itpart-ii/

 

Call me at 856-638-1868. Let’s talk and see if your relationship is worth saving.

 

Posted in Anger, Choosing a partner, Chronic Illness, Couples Counseling, Creating Intimacy in Relationships, Falling in love, Family Counseling, Keeping Relationships Healthy and Fun, Marriage Counseling, NJ Counseling Services, PTSD Therapists, Relationships on Holidays, Sex, Sexual attraction, South Jersey Counseling, South Jersey Therapists

Healing Anger, Trauma, Relationships – South Jersey Therapists

South Jersey’s Relationship and Trauma Specialist Looks at Anger in Relationships as a Cry to be Noticed

I’m Paula Susan, and as a specialist in Trauma and Relationships, I notice that anger is often the force that motivates unhappy couples to come in for therapy or pre-divorce counseling. Someone in the relationship is not being heard and that causes anger and deep hurt.

Resentments build when trying to talk to one’s partner and finding they are not really hearing. The result is that you feel unimportant and that makes you even angrier. Explosions don’t seem to make a difference, nor does withholding sex, or striking out with angry words. Affairs certainly don’t help. They don’t solve the problem. They create powerful new ones.

So, what to do? What I have to offer, after 34 years of doing this work of deep healing, after learning from the experts throughout the world, is the EMDR process which dismantles the anger. It offers insights and relief at the same time. I teach a Dialogue that creates safety and an intimate connection so that you and your partner can reestablish intimacy through understanding and compassion. It really works.

Often the thing that pushes people’s buttons has to do with old wounds carried a long time. The person closest to you can hurt those old scars, that just never completely healed. It is an important part of the work I do.

So, when you find yourself in a relationship that once was good, and you are building resentment and the distance between you is growing, think about calling me for help.
It won’t take long until you remember why you fell in love.

I’m South Jersey’s Trauma and Relationship Specialist since 1982. 856-638-1868

Posted in Anger, Choosing a partner, Couples Counseling, Creating Intimacy in Relationships, Falling in love, Keeping Relationships Healthy and Fun, Marriage Counseling, NJ Counseling Services, PTSD Therapists, Sex, Sexual attraction, South Jersey Counseling, South Jersey Therapists

Fathers’ and Mothers’ Day and Relationships

My blog on fathers’ and mothers’ Days and Relationships

I am a Relationship and Trauma Specialist, here in South Jersey since 1982. Many present day issues between couples – both married and living together – are often reflective of poor relationships between their own parents. Many of our reactions, many of our beliefs are born as a result of our early life experiences and the meanings we gave to them.
Angry, unhappy, psychologically damaged parents are often abusive – verbally, physically and/or sexually. That is when we learn early on that life is not safe. People are not safe. Trust is difficult if not impossible, and being sexually free is also compromised because of feelings of shame and pain. These are all traumatic reactions to what they lived.
So, when people think about honoring their parents – Mother’s Day or Father’s Day – they have problems finding a card that they can send that is honest. The fewer loving words, the better.
And, at the same time, there is a feeling of guilt because aren’t we supposed to love and honor our parents? Well, weren’t they supposed to love and keep us safe?
Holidays are difficult for most of us. Memories are most often not wonderful and merry. They can be fraught with major disappointment, even despair. How much of life is really how we would love it to be?

So to say that your father did the best he could given his own life, doesn’t change the fact that his lack of love and protection, his cruel words, his indifference had its impact on you and who you are today. He has left scars on you that you may not even know are there. However, they are. So, feel what you feel and read http://www.familyaffaires.com/mothers-fathers-day-the-survivors-of-child-abuse/
There are a lot of us out here trying to find a card that would fit. Hallmark does not make a card for “my father, the alcoholic.” The card company has romantics creating cards for them. And, there is not always the ache that you never had nor will have his loving influence.
Paula Susan is here in South Jersey since 1982, helping people overcome the grief, emotional pain, psychological damage they carry from unhappy years. Their relationships suffer. The quality of their lives suffers. And, they don’t have to live like that anymore. There are powerful tools, competent therapists who devote themselves to healing and giving people a new lease on a quality life. Paula Susan is such a therapist. 856-638-1868. She specializes in trauma and relationship/marriage issues.

Posted in Choosing a partner, Couples Counseling, Creating Intimacy in Relationships, Falling in love, Family Counseling, Keeping Relationships Healthy and Fun, Marriage Counseling, PTSD Therapists, Relationship with Mothers and Fathers, Relationships on Holidays, Sex, Sexual attraction, South Jersey Counseling, South Jersey Therapists

Masters in Social Work and Psychology
- Relationship & Trauma
- Specialist Since 1982
- Expert in EMDR
- HAT Practitioner

Short-Term
Dynamic Therapy

Training & Certifications in Energy
Psychology, Cognitive/Behavioral,
EMDR, HAT, EFT, Hypnotherapy,
Neurolinguistics and more.

IMAGO
Certified Relationship Specialist

Heal Relationships
Affairs:
To separate or grow beyond

Gay and Lesbian Challenges:
How to transcend them

Sexual Issues:
Release from dogma to freedom,
from passive to responsive

Communication:
Hearing and being heard -
real connection

Resolve Trauma
Board Certified
Incest, Tragedy, Sexual Violation,
Grieving, Chronic Illness

Clinical Depression,
Anxiety

Consultation to
professionals

Referral Network

READ PAULA'S OWN BLOG

Guest Blogger at

Paula was a guest on the weekly WGLS-fm Rowan Radio Show
Your Health Matters with Dr. Craig Wax
Topics Discussed:

  • How Relationships Can Be Compromised Due to Stress
  • The Economy's Impact on Relationships
  • And More...

Click below to listen
to the podcast!!!

Empowering Ourselves Interview